I Wonder...

Yesterday was WorldAIDS Day.  It is a day set apart to remember those who are living with HIV.

During the late 70's and early 80's, "The CDC report provided strong evidence that AIDS wasspread by blood. Altogether, almost 5000 hemophiliacs were to become infectedwith HIV before concentrates were rendered safe, and more than 4000 of the estimated10,000 hemophiliacs in the US would eventually die of AIDS." 

Every time I read that statistic my heart hurts for all of the people affected…the individuals that passed away and their loved ones.

My brother was born in 1962.  When the AIDS epidemic hit the hemophilia population he would have been about 18 years old.  I often wonder what his life would have been like.

Would he have been infected and already passed away?

Would he have been infected and still be here?

If he was still here, would he have been an active member of the bleeding disorder community?

What would he have taught my sons?

How would my parents have handled it all?

There are so many questions I have.  At the top of my list would be a question to my mom…"Why didn't you tell me?"

I don't think it would have mattered if I had known about hemophilia or not because I wanted to have children.  It may have been best that I didn't know so that I wasn't afraid of what "might" happen.  I enjoyed being pregnant with both of my sons.

All I can say is that I am a blessed woman to have two amazing sons.  And I am filled with gratitude that their factor products were not compromised. 

And for those who were victim to the tainted blood supply…my heart will always be with you.

I will never forget.