Catching Up

My "Christian" has missed quite a bit of school already this year.  We rejoiced because he recently completed 8 days in a row!  Then his port site was yucky and we had to go to the HTC and another day was missed.  Ugh.

What I am coming to understand is that 2nd grade is not what it used to be.  The requirements are just absolutely ridiculous!  Gone are the days of "review" at the beginning of the school year.  We have a tutor working with Christian twice a week to help him make up the time he has missed.

Unfortunately when you have a chronic illness and you miss many days of school (but not enough to qualify as "homebound") getting caught up is difficult.

My son struggles (at times suffers) from his bleeding disorder.  All he wants is to "be like the other kids" and it breaks my heart that the regular things kids are doing is sometimes almost too much for him.

I never thought we would be struggling to keep him caught up with his education.

Looking Back

When I look back at this picture knowing what I know now, it breaks my heart.  I couldn’t tell my "Christian" then what  I know now about how he would struggle and suffer with his hemophilia...that his journey would be filled with hospitals and pain.

Some people would even go so far as to say that I was irresponsible by bringing another child into the world with hemophilia...that I had my hands full with one child and another would be a mistake.

What I do know for sure is that my Christian is here on the planet for a reason.  He came to me ten years after his brother...ten years as I was an "older" mom.  His timing was perfect.  Actually it was God's timing.  Christian's struggles and pain are not without purpose.  He may be the next researcher to find a cure for cancer, or a Nobel Prize winner.  He could be a gifted teacher touching the lives of thousands of students or a musician writing music that touches peoples lives.  He could even be the example another young man with hemophilia needs to move on with their lives as they struggle in pain and wonder why they have been afflicted with this horrible disorder.

I have never doubted why my son is here.  What I struggle with is seeing his pain and not being able to take it away.  It destroys a part of me every time. 

 

But he is here to teach me how to love.